Children are typically ready to start potty or toilet training between 18 months and three years old. While it’s important not to feel pressured and not to pressure your child, it’s also a good idea to keep a close eye on signs that your child may be ready to start. Missing them can confuse toddlers and delay the process.
What are the signs my child is ready to start potty training?
- Your child is able to recognise when they are weeing or pooing, even if it is after the event.
- Nappies are dry for longer periods during the day, normally 2-3 hours or so. This shows your child is able to hold urine.
- Your child is able to tell you when they are wet or soiled.
- She shows interest in other people using the toilet.
- She is able to understand simple instructions, for example, do you need to have a wee?
How do I go about potty training my child?
- Prepare your child by discussing the process with them and showing them what you do. There are lots of story books on using the potty and toilet that can be helpful.
- Start to toilet train when the situation is right, ie your child is showing signs of being ready and you have time to be able to focus on it. Avoid training when your child’s routine has been disrupted or is likely to be disrupted, for example a new house, new sibling, moving from a cot to a bed.
- Involve your child in the process. Choose the potty and pants together and decide where the potty should go together. You may want to suggest a warm place with suitable washable flooring.
- Keep it a fun, light and enjoyable experience for them, for example by reading a book together or awarding stickers when they do well.
- Suggest your child sits on the potty every few hours but not so much they lose interest. The best time to sit on the potty/toilet is shortly after a meal or a drink.
- Remind them frequently that the potty/toilet is there.
- Show them how to take their pants down themselves to encourage independence.
- Praise and praise again, even if you have no result.
- It can be hard at times but try your best to keep calm.
Potty training problems
My child is refusing to sit on the potty after previously being happy to do so
If this is the case, it’s simply that the novelty factor has worn off. Rather than saying, “Do you want to do a wee?” say instead, “Don’t forget to wee on the potty,” or, “The potty is here if you need it.” This puts the onus back on your child and reduces the pressure for them.
It just doesn’t seem to be working
If your child isn’t making progress, it is probably best to stop and restart training when everyone is happier rather than keep trying and turning the situation into something unpleasant. Don’t forget, the older your child is, the more mature their brain will be, but remember not to miss the cues as this can lead to problems later on.
My child’s stressed by the arrival of a new sibling
If your child does have a stressful time for any reason, they may want their nappy back on or they may begin soiling themselves or soiling in unusual places. This is normal and we all regress if we are feeling upset or unsure of a situation. Be patient and give lots of reassurance – this will improve their self esteem and eventually the regression will pass.
Progression…
From potty to toilet
Your child may have gone straight to the toilet, or be using a combination of both potty and toilet, which is fine. However, if you do need to progress your child from the potty to the toilet, allow them to see what you do on the toilet. If they are not happy to sit on the toilet themselves, suggest they bring their potty into/or close to the toilet area. Progress with small steps and give lots of explanation of what you’re doing and why. It may be worth investing in a toddler toilet seat that sits inside the rim of the toilet seat. These enable children to sit more comfortably and confidently on the toilet.
Night times
It may be a while before your child is dry at night. Look out for dry nappies in the morning as a clue they may be ready to hold on through the night. You can help by giving plenty of fluids during the day to ensure the bladder fills up and can cope with a good volume. This will also help your child understand what a full bladder feels like.
Limit drinks after tea time and give sips instead of full drinks. Colourings, fizzy drinks and milk can stimulate the kidneys so try to stick to water.
Explain to them what you are trying to achieve and make going to the toilet before bed part of the evening routine.
Make the potty accessible to them during the night and leave a night light on so they can see and aren’t intimidated to get up and use the potty.
General tips
- Give lots of praise and ignore the accidents.
- Don’t rush the process – if it clearly isn’t working, stop and restart again when everyone is feeling calmer and more ready.
- Don’t miss the cues – your child will show you if they are ready and will appreciate your input.
- Expect setbacks and regressions, especially if a big event has occurred in your child’s life or their routine has changed.
- Have lots of patience and don’t force the process. This can lead to behavioural issues in the future.
- Think ahead and be prepared with spare clothes, potties and pants.
- Teach your child to wash their hands after using the potty or toilet.
- Ask for help – your health visitor or local health professional will have advice
Got a question for Judith about your baby or child? Drop us a line.
Related content:
